Monday, 18 July 2011

Scared - 18-07-2011

I should have updated a week ago really. I spent a week with G after he moved into his new house, and it was absolutely fantastic. I will write about that separately though. Right now, I'm feeling scared, and I need to get it off my chest.

In April of last year, I think, I started reacting to the cat. You know how you just have the instinct that tells you what you're reacting to? Well I knew it was the cat. I was constantly sneezing, a lot more so when the cat was around, it went to my chest and started feeling fluttery, so I started living on anti histamines; one type for night and one for day. Then I went to Egypt with Ian, and was a billion times worse when I got back ... the doctor said I'd picked up a bug on my trip and that's what caused the subsequent illness that lasted until last December. I was tested for cat allergy, and it came back negative; but people who are generally not allergic to most cats are allergic to Sienna ... so presumably she has a different kind of fur / dander. I asked to be tested for allergy to my specific cat, and just received funny looks from both my GP and the immunologist.

I started noticing last week that I was reacting to the cat again. She's molting again. When she started molting a few months ago I was relieved to find that I didn't react to her. I am now. She's obviously shedding a lot of fur; as she had her first massive hairball for the first time in years, the other day.

I took a nap this afternoon. I woke up with a really badly fluttery chest. I felt worse when I woke up than when I'd gone to sleep. Dead legs. Dead arms. Nauseous and queasy. Thick headed. My eyes hurt. In short ... I'm very scared that I'm getting ill like I was last year. And this time I'm on my own. I have no idea how I would survive if I went through, on my own, what I did last year :(

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