Thursday 23 February 2012

Don't leave the house!

I am not agoraphobic. However, I am nervous of going out in public. Actually, that's not strictly true. I'm fine going to the doctors, dentist, vets, hospital, any allocated appointment really. It is crowds, in particular shopping centres, and more specifically, queues, of which I am afraid.

A few years ago I made an innocent visit to the post office. As I was standing in line the woman in front of me was looking at something in my direction. She sneezed. I received the full spray face on. It was absolutely disgusting. I remember waiting for her to apologise, but of course that did not happen. Within 48 hours I was ill. A week later I was in agony.  My throat and nose were killing me and I was coughing so hard it felt like my ribs would crack. I was rather impressed when my doctor said I had a chest infection, throat infection, AND nasal infection. Of course I do not know these all came from Sneeze-Lady, but they definitely came from that day out. This is why I am more than a little nervous at heading out in public.

People are not sanitary. People don't wash their hands after using public toilets, then they touch things in shops; things you might touch yourself later, picking up whatever remnants they had left on their hands. People do not consider the health of the person next to them in a queue, or the person they happen to be walking past as they cough their germs into the air. How often have you heard someone say something akin to 'I don't know where I got this cold from, I don't know anyone else who's had it!'?

C and I went shopping last weekend (the 11th). We figured that after weeks of stress we should get out and do something enjoyable for a change. I used the wheelchair from the moment we arrived so that I did not deplete my spoons before having to trek a mile or so back to get it (learnt wisdom). It was a good day. I bought clothes. I ate a potato. It was a nice day, and I was exhausted afterwards.

I've been feeling nauseous for weeks, so when I started feeling more nauseous a few days later I didn't think much of it. When I had an upset stomach later on in the week, again I didn't think much of that either, as my body is so unpredictable that that isn't particularly unusual. On Saturday evening I didn't feel well. C somehow managed to persuade me to eat some ice cream that I really did not want to eat. Having done so I kind of knew I was going to be ill.

An hour or so later, C was snoring. At 11:30pm my stomach said to me rather clearly 'You should go to the bathroom now!'. So I did. I'll spare you the details; needless to say I was extremely ill. Honestly, I have never before been so ill in my life. I collapsed on the bathroom floor, absolutely exhausted, and called C. No response. I called several times, I banged on the bathroom door with various things, but he was out for the count. Ironically, it was my quiet crying a bit later on that actually woke him up.

I was scared to move. Every minute movement made me feel like I would be sick again. By 3am, I was dehydrated to the point that my mouth kept sticking to itself. C phoned his mum, uncertain of what we should do. She advised we go to the hospital. It is what we had both been thinking, though the thought of every bump in the road filled me with dread.

I was amazed at how busy the ER was at 3:30am in the morning, and scared that I would be waiting hours to be seen. Thankfully we had taken a bucket with us, and there was a toilet in the waiting room. We were called in to what they call the triage nurse; someone who assesses whether you need to see a doctor (who then assesses whether you need to be admitted). The nurse had an attitude with me from the moment she looked at me. My mouth was sticking together, the room was spinning, I was doing my best to not be sick, and had my legs crossed because I needed the toilet again, so I asked C to talk to her for me. In a rather confrontational manner she almost shouted at me 'Can't you talk to me yourself?', to which I said I could but I didn't wish to be sick on her. To me it didn't seem that she wanted to take me seriously. Having explained that I had started throwing up at 11:30pm, she asked me what my GP thought of the sickness. How could I possibly see my GP on a Saturday night? She allowed me to go to the bathroom during the middle of this consult, during which time C explained to her that I have severe M.E., and I managed to get lost trying to find them again. When I returned, she called for a wheelchair and admitted me to the next stage. C believes this was mostly because he'd told her I have M.E..

We were shown into what I presume was an assessment ward, where everyone was in little rooms by themselves. The guy opposite me was propped up, lights on, covered in blankets, with lots of pillows. I was left in a dark room, with no blankets, no pillows, no instructions on how to prop the bed thing up, with the air conditioning on full blast. They could see I was in my flimsy pyjamas. They knew I was having V&D. C went to ask a nurse where the toilet was. We were told that I was not allowed to leave that cubicle, and must use a commode. I was therefore brought a commode, but no toilet paper. I was still being sick.

Eventually a doctor showed up. He asked me a few questions. I tried to explain to him that I have M.E., and that I've been struggling badly for a few weeks with a reaction to mould; that my immune system has already crashed. I may as well have been speaking gibberish. He looked at me, said 'At your age your body will do what it is supposed to do, and fight the bug for you.', and he left.

At my age? Have I pointed out in my blog previously that people keep thinking I'm a lot younger than I am? Is it not fairly widely accepted that the bodies of those with M.E. tend to behave like those several decades older than they are? Was this man a prize idiot? C and I sat and stared at each other, wondering what we were supposed to do next. Eventually we asked a nurse, who said we should just go home as the doctor had not admitted me. We both assumed this meant that someone would come and pick me up with a wheelchair again, but this did not seem to be happening. So once again C bothered the nurse, who seemed genuinely surprised that someone who had been brought in in a wheelchair might actually need to go out in one too. A chair arrived. A chair with no foot pads!?!

We left the chair at the hospital entrance because the slope up to the car park was covered in snow and ice. I got a few steps up the slope when it became apparent that I had taken on a task a lot bigger than I could cope with. C had marched on ahead of me. I didn't have the energy to call him. The road by which the path ran was for ambulances only, so C couldn't have come down and picked me up anyway. I'd have crawled up the slope if it hadn't been for the snow and ice. I came very close to collapsing again, and once I reached the car I threw up violently.

I wish I had collapsed. An ambulance had driven past me. I have no doubt that they could see how much I was struggling. Had I actually collapsed I suspect they would have helped, and then I would have been admitted. I admit that I do want to make a full sized V sign at that doctor, but I also know that I should have been on a drip. I was extremely dehydrated, my body was in no shape to accept my attempts to put anything in it, and I was too weak for my body to fight.

Five days later and I am supporting my weight for the first time. I've been able to walk to the bathroom and back, but it has felt like I was controlling my body by remote control, and each trip left me exhausted. I ache all over as if I've run a marathon whilst lifting dumbbells. I haven't sat upright all week. I am now. I have no idea what my body thinks it is up to, as it isn't behaving properly yet, but I have been eating some toast and fish the last couple of days.

All because I went out and enjoyed a days shopping for once in my life.


[Edit]
There has been one very vital fact left out of this post, because I needed to talk to a close friend of mine before announcing it to her on my blog by accident. I am pregnant. This is why we went to the hospital with the dehydration, V & D so soon, and why we were so disgusted at the treatment received.

Saturday 18 February 2012

Can anyone say 'dictatorship'?

A friend of mine spent a couple of years working for VSO in Eritrea. When she came back she described to me a system that I simply could not believe. When Eritreans are young it is decided for them what career path they will take, and they are then lead through the system to that path. They do not have the choice that we do. I was horrified. Ok, so as a teenager I had no idea what career path to take (as a child, I knew I wanted to run an insect hospital), but I would not have been happy for someone I had never met in a government building somewhere, to write down next to my name 'road sweeper', or 'football player'. I can't imagine living in such a society.

Yet, it seems, some of us may be headed in such a direction. Both The Mirror and The Daily Mail have published shocking articles about our countries benefits system in the last couple of days. What is most shocking about them is that both newspapers are actually disgusted at what our government is doing to the sick and disabled. Both have previously played heavy hands in the propaganda against us, aiding the stigmas of 'lazy people' and 'scroungers', so to my mind, if these papers have picked up on how horrific the situation is, it must be seriously dire. (Though the cynic in me wonders if they've just realised they can scandalize a new market of reader).

Taken from Sonia Poulton's article in The Daily Mail:


"Let me be clear. There is nothing wrong with getting hands-on experience that will enable progression in your chosen path, and we've all done plenty of that, but there is everything wrong with being forced to work in a place that has nothing to do with your aims and ambitions and everything to do with creating a labour force that verges on slavery to the system."
"Disabled people will now face the prospect of unlimited unpaid work or they will be subject to cuts in their benefits. For millions that is nothing more than a line on a page but for many terrified and suicidal others, it is anything but."

Obviously, I understand a fair amount about of how the new system works. I am in the WRAG group myself. I had not realised though that I could be forced to take a work placement. When talking with the Job Centre, they conveniently left that piece of information out. Take a look at the job advertisement from Tesco above. The salary is "JSA plus expenses". Many of those commenting on the article are horrified. It is assumed that this is less than minimum wage, slave labour. It may well be, but since the hours are 'to be confirmed' we cannot be certain. I will be looking at similar job advertisements to work this out though. I have always believed Tesco to be a good, even generous, employer, so I am dearly hoping these assumptions are incorrect. That aside, I am still horrified that I, a graduate, who was so looking forward to developing her own career before I became ill, could be told to take a job pushing trolleys, which would very quickly disable me further. What no one seems to have noticed when looking at that job advertisement is that JSA plus expenses is a lot less than ESA plus expenses. Not good!

"We, as the country, are, quite literally, paying the consumer giant to make even more money. And we are doing that by having our taxpayer funded job seekers work free for the company."
It isn't right that large corporations such as Tesco benefit from free workers. If this is how the system works, it is most unfair. I would have presumed that the government would actually be making Tesco pay the worker the equivalent of JSA though. Ever the optimist aren't I.

Taken from The Mirror:
"Neil Coyle, of pressure group Disability Rights UK, said: “The idea that disabled people should work but receive no financial recognition for contributing is perhaps a level of abuse in and of itself.”

"He added: “When Conservative backbench MP Philip Davies suggested disabled people should work for less than the national minimum wage he was castigated. But it now appears to be Government policy.”
"
What is perhaps most alarming is how the country, has made such an about turn. As Neil Coyle points out it was not that long ago that that the notion of the disabled working for less than minimum wage was laughed out of the news, and yet it is now a reality. How has the government manufactured this situation? Colour me a conspiracy theorist, but there has been an awful lot of disability hate articles appearing in the media over the last few months. I can't help wondering if these facts are related.

Quoting Sonia's article again:
"If nothing else the Coalition are proving themselves, over and over again, to be worthy defenders of the rich. If you're in the top percentage of income earners in this country then you, too, should be OK."
And this is what most annoys me. Tax breaks. Not just generous salaries, but salary increases. Bonus's. All for the rich, not for those of us at the bottom of the ladder. How can they not care that they are literally taking from the pockets of the poor?

There are three million unemployed in this country. How would you feel as one of those unemployed if you knew that jobs were being made unavailable for you because someone who was sick or disabled was being forced to take the position you could have had, that the company 'employing' them is not paying their wages, and that the person taking the job will probably be made a lot more ill by doing so?

I have one final thing to say on this. I believe there will be an epidemic of sick and disabled people who have no income soon. It won't take many years. Those on contributory ESA (ie, those who have actually paid their taxes to be able to afford to be ill) will cease to receive ESA after one years illness. The government has put a time limit on how long you can be ill for. So, what happens when after a year you are still ill? I have been ill for over ten years now. Many others have been ill nearly as long, or longer than me. Under this system how will they survive? Who does the government think will support them? Care for them? If I was not with C, there would be no one to care for me! Without benefits these people will lose their homes, their possessions; they will end up on the streets.

I would not be surprised if we see people leaving the country. When people realise how dire the situation is, I believe some will take the last of the money they receive or have saved and seek refuge in other countries. I am not suggesting that other countries will support us in the way that we support so many asylum seekers in this country, but that living in a country that is cold, damp, and mouldy is not conducive to good health; those who realise this may well seek a warmer, drier, healthier climate, and simply live on the streets there. I will not be surprised to see English refugees abandoning this country.

I will leave you with some of the comments from Sonia's article in The Daily Mail:

"Sonia writes about the workfare scheme. The ad from Tesco offering permanent night shift positions for benefit (£67.50 a week) plus expenses is reproduced above. This is slavery and madness, and will affect everyone who works for a living by driving wages down even further. Personally, I will not darken Tesco's doors again.
- Jane, Brighton, Sussex"

"Wherefore now, Britannia? Are there no prisons, are there no workhouses?
- Dystopian, UK
"

"Well said, Sonia. I honestly think these measures are getting through because people don't really believe it's happening. Soon we will have sick people dying on the streets (having been 'sanctioned' for being too unwell to work for nothing) and unable to pay for healthcare. Councils will keep moving them out of sight. It really IS happening ... And you're right, it's happened before. [... cut]
- Cherry, Herefordshire
"

"If people knew the true horror of this they would be marching on the streets on how badly the government spend our money. Take it from me an income for a couple/ person /family of £140 a week and less than £6000 savings very little complicated state help is within your reach.........out of work, sick or disabled it just does nt matter...your ok. £26000 cap is a load of rubbish on benefits if your lucky you have £10 a day to cover every thing. Homelessness yes will be on the rise and they don t want them or people on benefits in the areas like Westminster, NASA cos they are rich.
- Janet, York "
There's a lot more if you want to go and look at them. There are a lot of angry people out there!


[Edit]
Since I wrote this post, Tesco have publicly stated that the advert you can see above was a mistake. I am relieved!

Thursday 16 February 2012

The M.E. And CFS Report

The M.E. And CFS Report looks good.

The idea behind setting up The M.E And CFS Report is to provide a place where people who have a diagnosis of either M.E or CFS can find all the latest news about their illness.

 Both Twitter and Facebook havebecome major ways of passing on information and raising awareness abut our illness, the problem is information on Twitter and Facebook is fast moving and it is easy to miss something. The M.E And CFS Report helps by collecting all of the information related to both ME and CFS that is beng currently shared online, and placing it in one place for you to read. I hope you find this a useful resource.

 Paul Winter

Carers

Excuse me. I know this is rather ungracious of me, and not at all professional. But hey, I have no profession, so ...

I have a "facebook friend". She is kind of annoying me. She has M.E. and FM. I have many friends, both real and "facebook" who have both these conditions. None of them have carers. This friend does. This friend takes frequent trips into town. She is studying a university course. Yet she has carers. Most of my friends who have M.E. and FM are house-bound, or bed-bound. Most of us have to struggle ourselves to try and make food, or rely on a kind friend / relative / partner to look after us. I myself have been bed-bound the last few weeks again, and am very lucky to have C caring for me.

Yet every morning this friend complains about her carers. I want to shake her and explain to her that having carers is a privilege that very few benefit from. I want to tell her that if she treats them like servants they will behave like servants. Most people who enter the caring industry do so because they want to help the disabled and incapacitated, not because they want to do the housework. I want to point out to her that if she constantly berates them with a bad attitude the caring company will deliberately send her the most difficult carers to deal with. She expects them to be robots, not people.

I know though that I cannot say these things to her. When people pass judgement on me and my illness it hurts, particularly if they are other people with M.E.. And that is why I am writing it here.

If you are fortunate enough to have carers, please be grateful for them. Treat them as people, with kindness and patience, and if you're lucky enough to have a regular carer whom you get on with, tell them how much they mean to you. They are paid a pittance to help you after all.

Wednesday 15 February 2012

Mycotoxicosis

I think I have finally figured out the actual cause of the onset to my M.E.. I have always thought it was a combination of things, which it possibly was, however, I am now 99% certain that a reaction to mould played a huge part in it.

In 1997, my best friend and I moved into rented accommodation. I became quite seriously ill, being diagnosed with Post Viral Syndrome and asthma. It was not until towards the end of our occupancy that we discovered that the flat had a rather serious mould problem (the landlord had hidden it behind furniture). Mysteriously, when I moved in to new accommodation I recovered from both diagnoses. I forgot about it, as you do.

Three years later, I moved in to another house with two friends. This house also had a mould problem. As it happens this time it was my own fault. I was bored, so decided to decorate the living room; pulling the wallpaper down revealed a huge patch of mould on the wall. The landlord assured us that it had been treated. However, treated or not, the spores were now released throughout the house, and my health deteriorated as a result. This is when I became severely ill, developing M.E..

The reason this has come to my attention is because I have been doing some research over the last few days. It has become apparent that the house in which I am staying, C's house, has a mould problem. In at least one room we believe the walls to be mouldy. In another room we discovered mould riddled old wood underneath the floor. What else there could be we are not yet sure, but need to find out rather urgently. I am once again bed-bound, I can barely support my own weight. I am having headaches, constantly coughing, I've become sensitive to light, sound, the cat, all because I've been exposed to spores again.

I have learnt that I probably suffer from a condition called Mycotoxicosis. Mycotoxins are produced by moulds. Mycotoxicosis is a severe reaction to prolonged exposure to mycotoxins (or moulds). The result being that when one is exposed to moulds again, the reaction is a lot more severe than that of an ordinary person. This would be why I can tangibly taste mould in the air when I walk in to a room with mould present, but most other people cannot. I am a lot more sensitive to it, presumably the bodies mechanism of protecting itself.

I have read in several places that prolonged exposure to mould can cause chronic fatigue. Most simply say 'chronic fatigue', one or two have been more specific and said CFS or M.E.. Bingo! I believe I have my answer. 

Below you will find a list of symptoms associated with mycotoxicosis. The website from which I have taken these is linked in the blog posts title for you. It states that you should expect to meet eight of the 36 symptoms listed if you have mycotoxicosis. I display 27. Admittedly, the majority I now meet may well be because they are part of the M.E. that I have developed as a result.

"The following are a list of the most common symptoms of fungal exposure (bear in mind, people never fit all of below criteria). Most people with some forms of Mycotoxicosis meet at least 8 (recent symptoms) of the following criteria:
  • Fibromyalgia/mps (and several correlated symptoms)
  • Respiratory distress, coughing, sneezing, sinusitis
  • Difficulty swallowing, choking, spitting up (vomiting) mucous
  • Hypersensitivity pneumonitis
  • Burning in the throat and lungs (similar to acid reflux and often misdiagnosed as such)
  • Asthmatic signs; wheezing, shortness in breath, coughing, burning in lungs, etc.
  • Irritable bowel syndrome, nausea, diarrhea, sharp abdominal pains, stomach lesions
  • Bladder, liver, spleen, or kidney pain
  • Dark or painful urine
  • Dirt-like taste in mouth, coated tongue
  • Food allergies/leaky gut syndrome/altered immunity
  • Memory loss; brain fog, slurred speech, occasionally leading to dementia
  • Vision problems
  • Swollen lymph nodes
  • Large boils on neck (often a sign of anaphylaxis)
  • Yellowing of nails, ridges, or white marks under nail
  • Thyroid irregularities, sometimes leading to complete dysfunction; adrenal problems
  • Headaches
  • Anxiety/depression, heart palpitations - confusion, PTSD
  • Extreme blood pressure, cholesterol, or triglycerides irregularities
  • Ringing in ears, balance problems (very common), dizziness, loss of hearing (aspergillus niger)
  • Chronic fatigue (also included under this classification directional confusion)
  • Intermittent face flushing; almost always systemic, Called the Mylar Flush (neurological))
  • Night head sweats, and drooling while sleeping, profuse sweating
  • Multiple chemical sensitivity; only upon exposure to Stachybotrys and Chaetomium
  • Nose bleeds (stachybotrys)
  • Bruising/scarring easily; rash or hives, bloody lesions all over the skin (Often systemic, see images; skin)
  • Reproductive system complications; infertility, changes in menstrual cycles, miscarriage
  • Sudden weight changes (Detoxifier genotypes tend to gain weight, non-detoxifier genotypes tend to lose weight)
  • Cancer
  • Hair loss, very brittle nails, temporary loss of fingerprints (in rare cases)
  • Joint/muscle stiffness and pain
  • Irregular heart beat/heart attack
  • Seizures, inadvertent body jerking, twitching, inadvertent facial movements or numbness in face
  • Hypersensitivity when re-exposed to molds, which can lead to anaphylaxis
  • Anaphylaxis upon re-exposure to mycotoxin producing molds
  • Death, in extreme cases"

It is alarming. I think most people are aware that moulds can be dangerous, but I don't think people realise how serious it can be. The reason this house currently has such a severe problem is because C went underneath the floorboards here and dragged out a lot of wood that was absolutely covered in mould. I had told him what the protocol for doing such a job was, but he did not follow it. As such I can only conclude that he did not believe the severity of the situation. And I am now bed-bound. Again.

Thursday 9 February 2012

An outsiders view

It is often interesting to view things from a perspective we can't possibly have ourselves. I came across this article by accident today. At first I didn't really want to read it, as I suspected it would bring up feelings of resentment again towards Dr Wessley and his interviews last year. I think this may actually be referring to a more recent set of interviews that I am not familiar with. 

It's written by an American. In America they seem to not have the political turmoil surrounding M.E. that we do here. It seems that we have our psychological study field fighting to protect an illness they wish to remain being classified as psychological. It is an interesting article, that makes for interesting reading. I've copied it below, but you can read the original by clicking the title of my blog post. 

This first quote though is actually taken from one of the comments following the article.

"Tip for journalists: if someone's waving their hands about in your face and yelling their heads off for attention, look behind them. What are they trying to distract you from?"

"When Journalism Becomes Sensationalism

"I often observe British tabloids with a sense of bemusement, but have held the BBC in high esteem. I do however, question the way in which the BBC reported a recent piece titled "Torrent of abuse' hindering ME research." by journalist Tom Feilden. Mr. Feilden interviewed a British professor of psychological medicine, and his retrovirologist co-author on a scientific paper, who complained about the abuse they have received from patients with myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME) also known as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS).

"No patients were interviewed (neither those that made threats or any of the hundreds of thousands who have not) nor were any of the hundreds of the researchers who have never been abused in the story. Instead Mr. Feilden interviewed a physician who is a scientific officer with a patient group who pointed out that the abuse and threats were coming from a very tiny minority of patients and suggested that a lack of research funds was the more likely reason fewer researchers were in the field. Balance? Possibly. Funding issues instead of death threats? Boooring.

"In the BBC story one virology professor who had collaborated with the professor who is a lightening rod in the field said she would never do research on ME/CFS again. And yet, a virology professor who runs a highly popular and acclaimed research blog in the United States, joined the scientific board of a large advocacy group as a result of his experiences. People's decisions are often as individual as they are. The question may be how tricky is it to make a "trend" out of the decisions of a few?

"During the original BBC interview the psychiatry professor read aloud from letters he had received containing a considerable number of swear words. While it is good that the BBC verified the threats to the professor did they verify the veracity of patient complaints against him? I think it is far easier to dismiss patient claims as "conspiracy theories" rather than investigate them. In part because while there is often a grain of truth there in my experience, the documented cognitive abnormalities that are part of this neuroimmune disease (patients call it brainfog) often create misunderstandings.

"The headlines went viral worldwide almost immediately. Columnist Rod Liddle of The Sunday Times produced a piece in which he mixed up the facts, left out easily verified facts and generally muddled the situation further. Headline after headline blared forth that researchers were threatened and as a result many researchers were staying out of the field. They certainly grabbed attention, but did they inform? Death threats, no matter how isolated, are a much sexier story than one in which the vast majority of researchers do not receive so much as a birthday card much less death threats from patients too ill to carry them out. The same scientists who do persevere in a field in which biomedical funding is demonstrably scarce.

"In the United States if you wish to know the amount of public funding a disease or field receives it will take less than five minutes. The NIH Project RePORTER is an excellent tool to contrast and compare funding levels. Not only can over all funding be compared, but the tools are there to determine the percentage of behavioral studies funded vs. biomedical studies. The question is, would including this kind of data have provided a far different picture than the one provided by the professors in question?

"As well, is it really all that difficult to find balancing expert sources in this field or any other health and medicine area? In my experience, not really. Although a study done by University of Missouri journalism professors shows that journalists rarely use PubMed for story ideas PubMed contains thousands of research studies with contact information in them – as well as story ideas.

"I in no way condone death threats – not to politicians, nor the rare professor in a controverial field, but I wonder if the real story was buried in a landslide of sensationalism. In the pursuit of the unusual as news did journalism further victimize an often marginalized demographic? Was the professor the victim of victims?

"The question may be whether sensationalism of isolated death threats would be more likely to deter researchers than because they or anyone they knew had actually ever received such abuse.

"*Ms. Benson has reported in the areas where the politics of health and medicine intersect with the psychological for a number of years. Interviews have included patients, patient advocates, advocate organizations, behavioral and biomedical researchers and staff of the government agencies involved."

Friday 3 February 2012

I'm so tired!

If you're a follower I apologise for this being a mundane post about living with M.E.. Nothing exciting to see here today. I just figure I should continue to update in this manner at least occasionally.

I am currently staying with a friend. She also has M.E.. This could be viewed as convenient in some ways. Her best friend does not have M.E., so whenever she stays here, my friend ends up crashing in a very bad way afterwards. I, at least, do not do that to her. Or her to me.

This morning neither of us awoke until very late. Possibly not even morning any longer. The plan today was to go shopping for a washing machine with her father, because theirs packed in yesterday (with the bed covers inside it). So, after a rather slow waking up process, we headed over to Comet. My friend and her father approached a sales person, told them what they required, picked out a machine, and went about paying for it. Two and a half hours later we were sat on the floor, exhausted. The sales chap was a complete moron. He kept making errors when trying to put the payment through, and in order to undo his errors he had to phone head office every time. I can't physically stand up for very long, standing in a stationary position is positively uncomfortable for me, so I sat on the floor fairly soon. I found after about half an hour that I was struggling to support myself even sitting though, and had to lean against one of the washing machines.

By the time we left the store, my legs were like jelly, very hard to walk on, and I felt so nauseous that you could call it sick. I think maybe the lights affected me. I was very glad that my friend's Dad was driving, as there was no way I could have driven us home safely. Within half an hour of being back at the house, we were both fast asleep in bed. A three hour nap. I was so exhausted that I kept waking up throughout resting, shivering ... in a house with the heating turned up pretty high. My body was not impressed at all.

So, now, we find ourselves at 1am, having just eaten toast for dinner because having a meal so late seems silly, blearily watching television. I hate when M.E. does this to my body clock. I hate when sales personnel can't do their jobs!

Thursday 2 February 2012

Watchdog want your Atos complaints!

The BBC show Watchdog are currently seeking people who have had bad experiences with Atos Healthcare. I think we know a few people who have don't we!

If you wish to submit your story you can do so on their website here.

I just submitted my own, but due to brainfog couldn't think how to phrase it very well, so doubt I'll hear anything back from them. I hope some of you have better luck.